5.28.2006

X Men 3 Review! (No Spoilers)

There's been a lot of shit-talking about X Men 3: The Last Stand on the internet. I've been reading some of it, and ignoring most of it. But the little bit I've seen from YouTube clips hasn't left me with high hopes. That said, I went into this movie with very low expectations, but I can genuinely say that this movie exceeded my expectations. They introduced a lot of new characters and a lot of new plot elements in X Men 3. So much so, that they pretty much glaze over what happening, just to get to the next thing.

For me, a dedicated fan, the things they really changed for the movie were some of the things I enjoyed the most. I really liked Vinnie Jones' Juggernaut, and I was the biggest shit talker about this character before the movie. He's just a big, powerful mutant in this one. He looks goofy, and kicks a lot of ass. Not really true to the comic (actually, that last part is), but in the comic, he's not a mutant. His power comes from something called the "Gem of Cyttorak." Also, he's Professor X's step brother. It's goofy just typing it. Can you imagine what it would look like on screen? Exactly. Plus, they included the "I'm the Juggernaut, Bitch!" line. I can't complain. Beast was good, too. Kelsey Grammer is The Beast. At least in his voice and manner. And he's the only character with any sort of character development. Plus, Beast fighting is cool. They included one of the X-Characters I'm really into now, Jamie Madrox, the Multiple Man. His power is that he can create duplicates of himself, then reabsorb them when he needs to. Fun. Three new characters I dug, even though screen time is very limited for all of 'em. Well, just Madrox.

There's a lot that feels rushed in this movie. The "Dark Phoenix" storyline (which was set up amazingly in X Men 2) is almost an afterthought. The main storyline is that a "cure" for genetic Mutation was developed, and social/ethical implications of such a cure, etc, etc, etc. With all the action, and introduction of new characters, and glazing over what happened in the last two movies, it just couldn't support itself under it's own weight.

Ryan always gets on me for being less critical about comic book movies, because they're comic book movies. As true as that may be, I still liked this movie. It's not good, but it's fun. Like I said, I set the bar low compared to the last two X Movies, and it was better than I anticipated. If you go in expecting this to be a Magnum Opus, then you'll be disappointed. If you go in expecting to see some fun effects, some fun characters, and Wolverine kick some ass, then see this movie. Otherwise, maybe the DVD will yield a little more meat in extended scenes. Bitch.

I give it 3 'X's' out of 5.

XXXXX

(sorry, couldn't find a decent graphic)



For those curious what the "I'm the Juggernaut, Bitch!" thing is all about click watch the video at the first link, then the second link, and you tell me if the cartoon had nothing to do with the movie.

I'm The Juggernaut, Bitch!

I'm also the Juggernaut, Bitch!

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